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Professionally ignore people with style.
You have reached me while I am heroically avoiding responsibility. I am currently unavailable while I attempt to become a person again. Cross-functional anxiety should be routed through someone with more availability. I will circle back after my absence and at least two coffees. If something is genuinely urgent, please reach out to your usual internal contact. Thank you for respecting my brief romance with absence.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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