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Professionally ignore people with style.

This inbox is haunted and I am not here to help. I am taking sick leave instead of spreading germs and resentment. Any request involving a discount, rush fee waiver, or vague miracle should wait. I expect to respond after I drag myself back into operational range. For urgent requests, use the agreed emergency channel if we actually have one. Good luck, and may the workflow forgive us both.

Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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