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Professionally ignore people with style.
This autoresponder confirms I have escaped my desk with confidence. I am using paid time off to stare at scenery and ignore notifications. Any issue marked critical should be critical in a way that could survive screenshots. I will reply when I return and regain enough structure to open my inbox on purpose. Anything urgent belongs with the on-call rotation, not my vacation conscience. Please enjoy this delay as a character-building exercise.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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