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Professionally ignore people with style.
If you were hoping for a rapid reply, the universe has other material. I am away because the previous pace was illegal in several dimensions. Please assume all non-emergency alignment can survive my absence. I will get back to you after my comeback tour begins. Immediate concerns can be routed to the department lead. Your cooperation with the nonsense is noted and unsettling.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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