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Professionally ignore people with style.
I am away from work and thriving irresponsibly. I am stepping away because my capacity has filed a formal grievance. Please treat most business escalations as suspicious until proven urgent. You can expect a reply after I finish avoiding notifications recreationally. Immediate concerns can be routed to the department lead. Please enjoy this delay as a character-building exercise.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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