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Professionally ignore people with style.
Bad news for your timeline: I am away. I am spending leave days nowhere near a laptop charger. Sprint plans will remain fictional without my immediate intervention. You can expect a reply after I finish avoiding notifications recreationally. For incidents, follow the documented escalation path and spare the heroics. Thank you for accepting this as your plot twist.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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