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Professionally ignore people with style.
This autoresponder confirms I have escaped my desk with confidence. I am using paid time off to stare at scenery and ignore notifications. Bookings, shifts, and customer theatrics will continue without my live commentary. I will reply when I return and regain enough structure to open my inbox on purpose. If this cannot wait, the on-shift manager is your best bet. Please enjoy this delay as a character-building exercise.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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