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Professionally ignore people with style.
This autoresponder confirms I have escaped my desk with confidence. I am taking sick leave instead of spreading germs and resentment. Please treat most business escalations as suspicious until proven urgent. Replies resume when I re-enter my workflow against my will. For immediate needs, escalate through the normal chain before inventing a new one. Appreciate your patience while I remain gloriously unavailable.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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