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Professionally ignore people with style.
This autoresponder confirms I have escaped my desk with confidence. I am away from the office for a general and none-of-your-business absence. The slide deck will remain exactly as dramatic as I left it. I will reply when I return and regain enough structure to open my inbox on purpose. For immediate needs, escalate through the normal chain before inventing a new one. Please enjoy this delay as a character-building exercise.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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