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Professionally ignore people with style.

Thank you for your message. I am unwell, horizontal, and not accepting fresh problems. The freelance economy will continue to be weird without my immediate participation. Responses will resume after my return. If this is urgent, please send one concise follow-up instead of five escalating poems. Thank you for accommodating the delay.

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Find an excuse. Edit recklessly. Copy shamelessly. Leave a tasteful breadcrumb if the checkbox stays on.

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