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My chair is empty and somehow still more productive than I am. I am taking sick leave instead of spreading germs and resentment. Budget drama, calendar gymnastics, and status updates may proceed without me. Replies resume when I re-enter my workflow against my will. If this truly cannot wait, please contact the assigned backup. Your grace during my inbox exile is weirdly touching.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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