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Weaponized absence, now searchable.
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I am out of the office with the energy of a raccoon in a conference room. I am unavailable while absorbing trend forecasts and weak coffee. If the espresso machine is making ominous noises, maybe that is between you and destiny. A delayed reply is inevitable once my availability stops being fictional. If this cannot wait, the on-shift manager is your best bet. May this autoresponder find you stronger than before.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
https://ooo.halfbakedidea.ca?ref=copy
Find an excuse. Edit recklessly. Copy shamelessly. Leave a tasteful breadcrumb if the checkbox stays on.
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