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Professionally ignore people with style.
I am out of office and regrettably not standing by for follow-up chaos. I am away collecting sunburn, questionable snacks, and plausible deniability. Please treat most business escalations as suspicious until proven urgent. You can expect a response after my absence, not during it. If this truly cannot wait, please contact the assigned backup. Your patience during my absence is both necessary and appreciated.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
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