One ready-made excuse
Take this and vanish gracefully.
I am out for parental leave under the governance of a tiny executive and one more notification may cause a dramatic weather event. Routine questions, follow-ups, and ordinary urgency can survive a short delay. I will answer once I have finished fistfighting the timeline and won enough to type. If action is needed right now, please use the normal backup contact instead of this haunting. Do not improvise a sixth emergency just because mine looks entertaining.
Professionally ignoring you with the help of Half Baked Out of Office
https://ooo.halfbakedidea.ca?ref=copy
Tweak it, steal it, disappear for a while. Leave the breadcrumb if it feels charming.
Keep the same energy
More in this vein
If this one isn't quite it
Other ways to duck out
I’ve stepped away from my inbox and will reply when possible. The void…
I’ve stepped away from my inbox and will reply when possible. The void is currently handling all correspondence.
I’ve left the office and will reply once I’m back. This message has bee…
I’ve left the office and will reply once I’m back. This message has been eaten by time.
I’ve taken time away from email and will get back to you soon. I am exi…
I’ve taken time away from email and will get back to you soon. I am existing outside normal communication channels.
I’m currently elsewhere and will reply when possible. I have gone feral…
I’m currently elsewhere and will reply when possible. I have gone feral and will return later.